"The not working group,"
you said to me,
"for your brand of blasphemy."

I trudged each painful step
Unable to let my smile slip.

They shook their heads
because they didn't understand.
I did a pirouette.

Maybe they knew me better than myself
maybe I wasn't better than anyone else.

A lighthearted jab in the middle of group
too quickly for me to recoup
and I'm crying and accusing.

There was too much too think about
as I watched the beach become my home.

 The mold has crumbled from lace curtains
A hot breeze doesn't find any relief
Water stains over everything
When did eyes become murky?

Soft grass grows modestly
the urban jungle grows ever wild
Green as far as the eye can see, yet
Somehow we became the fattened cow.

---

A tally every day
One and two and three, four
five

now we're we're really up
dancing wildly, the ride won't stop
rush of blood, burst of air
sometimes it's too much to care

we move like fire dancers
trying to keep our feet off the coals
we're dating necromancers
taking away the young and old

I try to avoid
carrying around my phone
you said you would call
and I just wait for it.

I read and re-read
the conversations I've saved
and it breaks my heart
to think of our lost love.

You smile and I collapse
inside on myself
because I just can't
let go of the past.

I tried to hold a wasps' nest

I tried to hold a wasps' nest in my palms
they stung and bit me the whole time
my hands fell dead and I let go

I stepped across a frozen stream
feet wet with ice, turning black
the frost bit, and I stumbled on stubs.

A clash of intent and intuition
fear and fire consuming each other,
I don't know which will win
except that nobody wins in war.

---

Flight of the Monarch

The lovely monarch flutters on wind
Showing it's bright colors to the sun
Tasting in simple delights
like the nectar of a flower
or the warmth of the air.
In the skys darkest hour
the monarch flies in monochrome
alone, poised on a twig
before it too falls with the sun.

===

Procrastination

Sitting on my hands
my blood slows and nerves dull, as
if something's missing.

---

Scraping out Secrets

Bright and brutal lights shine on
With out a care for what I see
Metal wires invade my mouth
Prodding into every crevice and pore
Exposing dirty secrets to the air
The cold, sterile floor chills my feet
As I open and close, spit and rinse
all at a strangers command.
Blinking, I wonder why I obey so promptly
but as if in a dream I can't help but think
This is too much water for me to swish.

---

The Crows Nest

I watch the sailing ships
and with them I sail away
dull eyes unfocused on the horizon
Onward, into the Pacific I glide
The finches of the Galapagos squack in hello
but are welcomed with a blank stare
Onward we sail, my crew and I
only maybe I am the crew
who knows where the horizon ends?
Possibly to the egde of the world
or the frosted, ashen slopes of Erebus.

===

The Birth of a New Heart

Borne into a machine, my sister was
Without it she would have died
it nursed and cared for her
while through plastic gloves
my mother handled her.
His entrance was a mite small
my brother needed technology
to help him grow strong
on and on he stretched
and nows he's quite large.
Tied to the machine
on which my family was founded
my hands and arms pulse with blood
but my mind and heart are bound
to the battery of the world.

~~~

The Problem with Art

Falling softly like cherry blossoms
words fall from my lips
Like a dream I always forget.

Spining madly like a tornado
ideas spin in my head
never forgotten, but lost to the wind.

Winding together like a spiders web
pictures unwind from my fingers
meanings murky like a spider biding it's time.

Dusting everything in sight
or clouding things with a flurry
poetry comes uninvited
and leaves in a hurry.

---

Time wasted or time well spent
what is productive and what is expected?
To build a sand castle takes time
and falls apart in a flash.
A house of cards appears sturdy
until it lies on the ground.
We see pictures in the clouds
but we build solid in the earth.
Who knows what our actions are worth?

Living in the Pacific

over our graves
historians mutter in corners
arguing about our contribution
to the world of tomorrow
computers, cars, and pizza ovens
but what about our thoughts?
the greatest minds of our day
lost in the webs they made themselves
I sit here imagine the arguments
while I live them in the middle
of the endless, empty ocean of people

---

Staring into space
my imagination brings me
from place to place.

looking at the wall
I blush over moments
of shame and blunder.

gazing at the sky
I cry over people
I've lost with time.

blinking in the light
I smile into the eyes
of people who loved me.

frowning at the cement
I remember where I am
and the lonlieness around me.

The Courtiers Dance

The first blush of romance
Taints porcelain skin
The shy steps of love
gracing well worn halls
The first fumble
turns cheeks a deeper shade
of embarassment and shame
sweet kisses on the hand
to passionate grips of lips
The second mistep
and we make up for missed beats
of a heart that never stops.
and by the end of it all
the world goes up in flames

one step
and I was on the ground
kissing dust
praising your foot prints

I roll over
and I'm staring at sky
admiring air
recounting your unspoken words

crawl forward
and I'm kneeling in mud
clutching mud
mouthing goodbye to no one

---

The Varsourviana
we're pulsing, glowing
you're gentle starlight
and I'm going supernova

two wrong steps
and the dance fades
all thats left is polka
in harsh, unwanted tones

melody overtaking
and I'm melting down
you still glow
but not with starlight

two long steps
and you're gone from sight
and I'm alone with tonic
then- a gunshot

---

in a world full of witches
she needed the wizard
not corny sayings
or high pitched songs
not even candy
or cool shoes, really
but she found anyhting but

the world was an illusion
layered over banks
and quarters
and William Jennings Bryan
but she was a popular girl
and when she got home
she found that
Oz was closer than she thought.

---

swiftly the boat moves
as I trail a toe along
and absorb myself in Keats

lazily we move along
as I stare up at the sky
hungry and bored

everything hits the rapids
when I try to reach land
of course I fall in
when I reach for your hand

---

sweet fresh oranges
growing everywhere
fragrant groves
your hands in my hair

I zest my orange
with your pocket knife
throw it like confetti
while you peel intently

the first piece is glorious
we lose ourselves in the rest
I remember why I thought
you were never second best

Sigular, Plurals
what does it all mean?
I know the singular's irregular
but the plural confuses me

Clauses, Conjunctions
where do they take us?
I can locate them fine
I just can't write them right

Direct Objects, Verbs
who is making the pass?
I can see the reciever
but I can't catch

steel walls encase the void
I in mine, and you in yours
the chill is all encompassing
but it slides right off me
I wear my black veil inside
to hide my sins and help me lie
The steel scoured till it shone
and everyday I peer through to see
myself, dying slowly in misery
the tides of time wash away at my youth
leaving me feeling old and world weary.


---


smiles slide across my face
as I sit staring into space
memories flitting through my mind
of when I was yours and you were mine
so maybe I'm a little wasted
I'm probably not in my right state
but I can't take my eyes off of you
no matter how bad I want to

I killed my best friend
grinning as I slid the knife in her back
grimacing as she turned for a look
sorrow and anguish, a blessing in disguise
she looked deep in my eyes
but all she found was lies.

I killed myself
a cold stare looks down on my face
eyes narrowing with discontent
I reached out to myself,
but all I grabbed was fog
and then I was lost in the mists.

I killed my ancestors
a meeting hall of peace and glory
I swept in, and it all turned gory
their disappointment plain on their faces
and something else I couldn't place
Love, forgiveness, and acceptance.

Morbid and pointless
.22 calibur and fully loaded
one shot then a pause
look at what I've caused
eyes wide in awe
a second shot, a scream
chasers to keep the space between.
I'll never live up to your bloody glory,
but I swore to have some story.

Your hard disco core
Knocks on my door
They said you were dead
But you've never looked more alive
We sit here and groove
To my hot metal jive
I've nothing to loose
and we've got nothing to hide.

Hi this is just a little poetry journal. Don't mind me, I'm just a poor simple southern girl all caught up in the rock I can't stop.
:)